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 he Guardian Poker Column |
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| Victoria
Coren |
| Friday September 30,
2005 |
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| Email :
TheEditor on any
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How to play poker
(How to play has been running from issue 16) |
Here is the first tip for modern British poker players:
don't try to play like the people on TV. The rise of televised poker is
excellent news, as it has taught newcomers a very lucrative range of habits.
Lucrative for the rest of us, that is.
On television, people stick all
their chips in the pot with bad hands. They bluff a great deal, either from
short-stacked desperation or a simple attempt to look cool on screen. They call
too many bets from other people, for fear of being bluffed themselves in front
of an audience. They think for ages about each decision, mainly in the hope of
hogging more screen time.
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In real life, if you play with bad hands, you
will lose. If you bluff a lot, you will get caught. If you call too many bets,
you will fritter your chips away. And if you think for ages, you are simply
giving your opponents more time to get a read on you.
So why do they do
this stuff on TV? Firstly, and most importantly, because people at home can see
their cards. Thus bluffing looks gallant and macho, while passing the best hand
looks weak and girly. But if nobody can see your cards, there is neither credit
nor shame. You are Steve McQueen only in your own head.
Secondly,
televised poker is always tournament poker - if you run out of chips, you are
knocked out. With a limited chip stack and a ticking clock, sometimes you just
have to make crazy gambles. But in most home poker games, you can always buy
more chips, and the game doesn't finish until it's time to relieve the
babysitter. Or have children. So you can afford to wait for a decent hand. (We
will define "a decent hand" later in the series.)
Lastly, televised
poker is usually "no limit", meaning that you can bet any amount you like. This
is a much faster and more aggressive variant than the traditional British home
game of "pot limit" (where players may only bet a maximum of whatever is
already in the pot). Pot limit requires a greater level of care and sanity - so
make sure you display some.
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